New TCP - Scene 1

I. 

 (there is a bed shaking from the next room)

Rabbi Hillel: I'm afraid it's a blood disease called anemia. Has the King ever opened his veins then clotted them with wool?

Captain of the Guard: Not to my knowledge. 

Herod (the bed still shakes): MARIAMNEEEEEEE!!!!! (the shaking stops)

Rabbi: If Rav Shammai comes to know that Mariamne's honey preserves body sleeps next to the King on occasion, Herod's reign will descend into civil war and few will survive. But Herod clearly will kill anyone who means to part him from it. So long as the body stays preserved in honey when not in Herod's chamber, it should be free of any maggoted infection and there is no true harm in Herod taking comfort in her, but he is clearly not of his own mind, so keep a vigilant watch else we all must fear. 

Captain: Is the King's illness brought on by proximity to the corpse?

Rabbi: I'm inclined to say no. The honey preserved Mariamne well and the body clearly provides him consolation. 

Captain: Is he going to survive? 

Rabbi: I'm not willing to say. 

Captain: You're not willing to say that he's going to die or you're not willing to say because there's still a chance he might live?

Rabbi: Both. 

Captain: Ochen vey no captain would know what to do in a situation like this. 

Rabbi: Then don't do anything. 

Captain: You know that's not an option. 

Rabbi: I know that. If he dies his sons will kill each other one after the other to get the crown. After all this it will just be more of the Aristobules and Antipaters. 

Captain: Then we should...

Rabbi: Yes. If you have to, call in a person who isn't Herod's son. 

Captain: One that can be easily disposed of.  

Rabbi: I didn't say that. 

Captain: You didn't say that we can dispose of an heir should Herod come back? Or you didn't say we should prevent any of Herod's children of being the new king? Or you didn't say the new person we call in should be the new King?

Rabbi: I didn't say that...

Captain: I see. 

Rabbi: Yes... I suppose you do. 

Captain: Who do we call in?

Rabbi: There's only one option. 

Captain: Reb Hillel, she testified against her own daughter! Isn't there some sort of ruling pro-

Rabbi: After all you've done you're choosing now to get squeamish?

Captain: But she's such a viper. 

Rabbi: Is she any more viperous than our king?

Captain: Well no. 

Rabbi: Does she have her own army?

Captain: Yes. 

Rabbi: Does she have a substantial following among the people?

Captain: Yes. 

Rabbi: Does she have powerful international allies?

Captain: Yes. 

Rabbi: Would she win a civil war against all Herod's children? Even if they banded together for more than five minutes? 

Captain: Yes. 

Rabbi: Is she the very last of the Hasmoneans who can ensure that rule of Judea stays Jewish?

Captain: Yes. 

Rabbi: You know we have no choice.