Friday, December 11, 2020

Secret Santa

The concept of 'Secret Santa' astounds me in so many different ways. The logistical hurdles of it alone seem to me like a nightmare:

1. How is gift giving for people you don't know particularly well a practical idea?
2. How is buying gifts for people you don't know particularly well not creepy?
3. How does the drawing of lots for who gets a gift from whom not cause eventual bitter feelings because inevitably somebody gets a superior/inferior gift?
4. How does one establish a price limit on gift giving without causing fights about what the agreed upon price should be?
5. How is this not effort better spent giving gifts to people whom you know better?
6. How does the inevitable premature discovery of one's Secret Santa not up the pressure to deliver a better/realer gift?
Most importantly, 7:
If we're all at the age already to establish that the person/benevolent force we all once assumed was Santa is not, in fact, Santa, then what is the purpose of 'Secret Santa?' The whole concept of Santa Claus is already predicated on a secret: that Santa Claus is in fact your parents who love you far more than a supercentenarian stranger who comes down your chimney from the North Pole. So once that cat's out of the bag, there's no secret anymore, and Santa Claus is back to being just a strange person getting you a gift, but in reality, when a person who doesn't know you gets you a gift, it's always gift you didn't want.

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