Sammy Kirchenbaum hosts an event in Beth Shalom, a reform temple in Jericho on Ephraim territory: text distributed as a papyrus pamphlet at orthodox temples around Israel
So here's the rule: Anybody here can debate me! Seriously, anybody. If you want to question me, if you want to answer me, if you want to yell at me, this is your time. Anything you want to say to me you can say, just be prepared for me to respond and get in line here (points to spot in front of him, everybody runs up to the spot and gets in line, some are pushy, Samuel sits on the ground in front of them.)
Young Man: Thank you for coming here.
Samuel: My pleasure.
Young Man: My question is...
Would Be Prophet: WATCH OUT EVERYBODY! THE MASTER DEBATER IS HERE!
(Laughs, shouts of OOOOH! Claps.)
Would Be Prophet: THIS IS FREEDOM OF SPEECH! WE DON'T LIKE IT! CURSED BE YOU ABOVE ALL LIVESTOCK! CRAWL ON YOUR BELLY AND EAT DUST!
(would be prophet says more but can't be heard over all the commotion)
Samuel: Why don't you... come up... come up to the bimah.
(giant cheers, giant boos)
Samuel: Come up to the bimah! Come on! Come up to the bimah!
Half the Crowd: AM YISRAEL CHAI! AM YISRAEL CHAI! AM YISRAEL CHAI!
Other Half the Crowd: VIVA VIVA AMALEK! VIVA VIVA AMALEK! VIVA VIVA AMALEK!
(eventually crowd dies down)
Samuel: Since you're such a khakham, show the world what a tzaddik you are! You'll get to preach from the bimah instead of the door.
(entire crowd cheers)
Samuel: So now we know that you're a rashaw who's doing this for attention because you can't stand in line like everybody else (audience screams in every direction) ... Tell us what's so vikhtik that you have to cut in line and interrupt us before he can even ask his question.
Would Be Prophet: So... uh... let's talk about the 200 Philistines who were thrown out of their homes in East Jerusalem. I don't know if you saw the cuneiform bulletin this morning, but an Israelite citizen was among them.
Samuel: It was not an Israelite citizen.
Would Be Prophet: Liar.
Samuel: It was actually a...
WBP: (interrupting) What? Come on.
Samuel: It was actually someone that was living here. It was not an Israelite citizen
WBP: (interrupting) LIAR!
Samuel: It was not a...
WBP: (interrupting) Hey! This guy just shtupping lies. (boos) It's not... HEY. NONONONONO! You wanna... You wanna... You wanna have a debate but you don't debate.
Samuel: It was not an Israelite citizen.
WBP: YOU WANNA HAVE A DEBATE BUT YOU DON'T DEBATE! THERE'S NO STAGE MORE RIGGED THAN THIS!
(Samuel tries to get a word in but can't)
WBP: NAME TWO TIMES WHEN YOU...
Samuel: Show me you're losing without telling me you're losing.
(crowd explodes. Would be prophet looks dejected.)
WBP: What?... So you're just gonna lie?
Samuel: So it's not an Israelite citizen. He was living here for a while. He was part of the Philistine Loyalty Organization. Answer yes or no. Should members of a terrorist organization be able to stay in Israel after they've murdered, raped and gone after Israelite citizens?
WBP: (interrupting) Wait. Obviously no.
Samuel: So we have deported those people back to their country! Ammon is the real home of the Philistines!
WBP: Their!.... Deuteronomy 19:15 calls for two or three witnesses.
Samuel: D'varim 19:15 does not apply to non-citizens!
WBP: (interrupting) That's KHARTA! IT SAYS ANYONE ACCUSED!
Samuel: No. Only to Israelite citizens.
WBP: That's a lie. HE'S A LIAR! He can't debate, he just lies!
Samuel: OK you've sworn like three times, can you just calm down?
WBP: What? You don't like freedom of speech?
Samuel: Well, you could say whatever you want if you want to make a na'ar of yourself, but we do have ten year olds and eleven year olds so can we have some decency?
WBP: (interrupting) I don't care. Whatever.
Samuel: Of course you don't care. You're a typical Reform Jew because you only care about yourself, not about other people. (crowd explodes again)
WBP: Who said I was a reform Jew? WHO SAID I WAS A REFORM JEW?
Samuel: Well it's very clear by how you're acting. Let me ask you a question: should we be able to deport terrorists who are here in Israel?
WBP: With due process.
Samuel: And we gave them due process.
WBP: WHAT WAS THE DUE PROCESS?
Samuel: They were part of the PLO, that was very clear, and now they're in Ammonian jail.
WBP: (interrupting) Then how did a per... No that's not true. That literally isn't true. Also WHY WOULDN'T THEY JUST GET DEPORTED? Why do they get sent to a jail?!
Samuel: Deported to a jail. By the way, many of these people...
WBP: (interrupting) By the way, THIS ISN'T EVEN THEIR COUNTRY! THEY'RE NOT AMMONITE!
Samuel: Many of these people are already in prisons for crimes they committed against Israel. So do we have a right to decide who is in the interior of Israel.
WBP: Yeah.
Samuel: So what's your disagreement?
WBP: IT'S CALLED DUE PROCESS!
Samuel: Again, the due process. If every single one of them got their own date, and their own trial,
WBP: (interrupting) THEY DID NOT GET A TRIAL!
Samuel: If they got that.
WBP: (interrupting) That's the problem.
Samuel: If they got that it would take us ten years to deport 200 people. We have a Halachic right
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